From expectations to fulfilment: discovering happiness through the happiness equation and biblical teachings
The happiness equation
Happiness = Reality - Expectations
In a thought-provoking interview on the “Diary of a CEO’ podcast, Mo Gawdat, renowned author and former Chief Business Officer at Google X, shared profound insights on the happiness equation.
Join me on a journey as I explore Gawdat’s perspective on happiness and how his equation can guide you towards a life of genuine contentment.
The happiness Equation: reality v Expectations
According to Gawdat, the key to understanding happiness lies in the relationship between our expectations and the reality we experience. He presents a simple yet powerful equation:
Happiness = Reality - Expectations.
In other words, our happiness is influenced by the gap between what we expect and what we actually encounter.
I was always so moved by the story of Anne Frank and her family, confined in a small room in the middle of a war , hunted down by nazis. In the pages of her diary she taught me that being content and happy is a choice. Despite her morbid circumstances she chose to be happy in the midst of suffering.
In my own life the same truth dawned upon me. I had allowed myself to be a victim of my circumstances, my focus was always on my expectations, I am a meticulous planner and unmet expectations often left me miserable and frustrated. Upon much reflection, I realised that many a times my experiences had been negative. It was almost as if I was always finding fault with everything, intentionally. Happiness seemed to elude me. Until one day the happiness equation was imprinted on my mind.
On a Monday morning, in the beginning of May, I had gone to the pharmacy to get a vitamin B injection. I had started going every month, in order to help boost my energy levels. As the pharmacist proceeded to inject me I expected it to be painful, very painful. I resisted the pain and my muscles became tense and the experience was excruciating painful. The pain remained with me for days and weeks.A few weeks later , in the following month I went back to the pharmacy, this time knowing what lay ahead , I surrendered to the experience that was ahead and the words “embrace it don’t fight it” came to my mind .I inhaled and chose to be relaxed, fully aware that the injection would inflict pain. However, this time I felt no pain. Obviously the reason for that being the fact that my muscles were not tense but in that moment I realised the secret to happiness. Embrace it don’t fight it. Make the experiences presented to you , whatever they may be , your own. Often it is easier said than done , but actively focusing on the present moment and shifting your focus on the things that are in your control and the things you are grateful for.Meditate on these things and reflect on all the things you have now that you used to only dream about and as a result release yourself from all your preconceived expectations and simply live.
Mo Gawdat emphasises the importance of managing our expectations. Society often conditions us to believe that material possessions, external achievements or societal standards hold the key to happiness. However, Gawdat challenges this notion, highlighting that lasting happiness comes from within.
Shaping our mental models central to Gawdat’s philosophy is the concept of shaping our mental models- the lenses through which we perceive the world. By cultivating positive mental models and challenging negative thought patterns, we can foster a more optimistic outlook and enhance our overall wellbeing.
In Finding purpose and fulfilment, Gawdat, underlines the significance of having a sense of purpose of our lives. He encourages individuals to identify their core values, passions and unique contributions they can make to the world.By living in alignment with our purpose, we experience a deep sense of fulfilment that transcends fleeting happiness.
The power of practicing gratitude is a transformative tool for happiness. By focusing on the positives in our lives and expressing gratitude for even the smallest blessing, we shift our perspective.This shift allows us to recognise the abundance around us, leading to a greater sense of joy and contentment.
We should strive to nurture meaningful connections and cultivate them.We should invest time and effort in building strong bonds with loved ones, friends and communities. The healthy relationships in our lives are essential for long term happiness. They provide us with support, love and a sense of belonging, all of which lead to a truly meaningful life.
As a christian, this is a biblical principle. Christ calls us to be transformed by the renewing of our minds
( Romans 12:2), He calls us to meditate on things that are true, noble, right, pure and lovely, admirable, excellent or praiseworthy ( Phillipians 4:8).
As we reflect on the profound wisdom shared by Mo Gawdat, the exploration of the happiness equation and the transformative power of aligning our minds with the mind of Christ, we find ourselves on a path towards genuine contentment and inner peace.In a world often preoccupied with external measures of success and fleeting happiness, Gawdat’s insights remind us of the importance of managing our expectations, nurturing positive mental models and finding purpose routes in our core values. By embracing gratitude, cultivating meaningful connections and focusing on the true sources of happiness, we can navigate life’s challenges with resilience and hoy.
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